Funny Things that Noa has said lately

Noa (after kissing me to wake up) - "Mom, you sleep well?"

Me- "Yes I did!"

Noa- "Mom, you want eggs?"

Me- " Sure!"

Noa- " How about peanut butter??!!!"

Then he whipped out a big jar of peanut butter and put it on my bed.

______________________________________________________________________________

njnccgyyiiuu <------ Noas contribution

Noa threw his Happy meal on the car floor, he didn't want his fries, he only wanted to play with the toy. So I picked up the bag and I started munching on the fries (pretty soon the fries were gone.......) Suddenly, Noa says, "Mom, I want my fries." Me-"Im sorry buddy they're all gone. Let's go get more ok?" (I felt so bad.) Then the car fell quiet and from the carseat this little voice, very sternly said, " I'm going to spank you."

I just about crashed the car laughing~

I love this little boy

Gods Tender mercies

Let's just give today a name. POOPY! I didn't work within my healthy boundaries and as a result WHAMMM! I am not a happy camper. I should have gotten a babysitter, I should have said 'no' I should have left on time, I shouldn't have yelled. (Now my throat hurts) I should have filled up on gas before I was late, not when the car wouldn't start because I was ACTUALLY out of gas.

SHOULD SHOULD ShOuLd should!!

Up to speed on the day yet? Welp here's where Heavenly Father went..... Uhhhh Hilaree, It's not that bad.

Hilaree Cries because she didn't make it to class in time all because of a chain reaction at the beginning of the day. ( And who bore the brunt of the chain reaction most of the day?? NOA! ding-ding-ding!!)

Hilaree pulls into Barnes & Nobel. She knows she is on fumes. Literally and emotionally. Sits for a while. Cries, Because she read this from the self help book that she bought. Called,

"Ten Habits of Happy Mothers" By Meg Meeker, M.D.

YOU ARE MORE PRECIOUS THAN YOU KNOW

I know this because in my twenty-five years as a pediatrician, I have gotten a peek from behind your kids' eyes. I can see you as they see you. I have heard the excitement in their voices after you have praised them. I have seen your kids define you as their hero when you are in the other room. I have heard them cry over your hurt, laugh at your jokes, and pull their hair out because of your stubbornness. (Which by the way they appreciate) I have literally read the value that you hold in your kids lives, all over their faces and through their body language. When you walk into a room, your son changes immediately. He relaxes because you are there and life feels safe to him again. If you recently scolded him, he scours your face to see if your still mad, because he needs to know how you feel. YOU MATTER. Your mood changes his world a bit. If you are in a good mood, he can relax and play with his trucks. If you are upset with him, he wants to make up (he may not show it, but he does) because you are the center of his small world. He needs you to like him again. You. No one else. Because once you are happy with him, he can go about his business and life will feel good again. He can focus at school, get his homework done, and pay attention to his basketball game. That is the power that you have and that power comes from the fact that in this child's life-your child's life- who you are matters as much as life it's self. You are loved.

I want you to feel good about who you are as a mother because you should. That's another thing that I have learned about you as I have watched over the years. You need to feel good about the job that you are doing because, if you are like most American moms, you are far too critical of the job you are doing. I know this because I can see that being a great mom matters to you. You want to get it right and asses your performance daily. What you need to know id that you asses your performance far more critically than your kids do- they just want you. Kids don't care if your thin or plump, they don't care if you make brownies from scratch, from a box, or if you buy them. They just want to eat the brownies with you. Feeling good about your value to them is important because the better you feel, the better your relationship with them will be; and the happier both of you will be. Sounds simple, but understanding our value and then feeling good about the mothers that we are ( or maybe even saying it out loud!) is one of the toughest challenges we mothers face.

Here are the words that I so badly needed to hear. Im sobbing at this point, (good thing I was alone) and I feel so humbled. I'm not going to get it perfect every time. It's my seeing me through Noas' eyes that will make the changes. Dare I step back and humbly say, that when I picture me through Gods' eye, with all of his understanding, and unconditional love, that I truly am not a broken mother; but more of a growing mother?

Though I struggle, as it is not that easy to let myself off the hook. I do love the perspective.

As I am chewing on this new hope. I try to start my car, POOF! Will NOT start. Why?? Im out of gas!! Wahoo! I get to walk about a mile to get a gas can and gas. ( in sugar house!)

I start walking, soul still a little tender from crying and the dose of humility, not wanting it to get dark before I get back to my car. I very nice person pulls over to offer me a ride back to my car.

His name is 'Shorty' and he decided to pay it forward. He said that he loved to help, that he always tried to be in a happy mood 24/7 . ( I guess when your truly happy, and not focused on yourself, your a great person for God to choose to be his helping hands. )

In our short ride back to my car, Shorty reminded me that life isn't as hard as we view it. That its a beautiful gift. He helped me fill up my tank. Gave me 'Knuckles' and said, "goodbye." Probably never to be heard from again.

Not only did God remind me that my value as a mother is great, he also reminded me that it is HIS job to take care of the little things. (like finding 'shorty' to give me a ride back home)

I am so grateful to have had this experience today.

All my Love,

Hil

C.S. Lewis he is becoming very popular in everyday conversations as of late.

"It would seem that Our Lord finds our desires not too strong, but too weak. We are half-hearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and ambition when infinite joy is offered us, like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at the sea. We are far too easily pleased."
— C.S. Lewis (Weight of Glory and Other Addresses)

Interesting .......

C.S. Lewis

"Imagine yourself as a living house. God comes in to rebuild that house. At first, perhaps, you can understand what He is doing. He is getting the drains right and stopping the leaks in the roof and so on; you knew that those jobs needed doing and so you are not surprised. But presently He starts knocking the house about in a way that hurts abominably and does not seem to make any sense. What on earth is He up to? The explanation is that He is building quite a different house from the one you thought of - throwing out a new wing here, putting on an extra floor there, running up towers, making courtyards. You thought you were being made into a decent little cottage: but He is building a palace. He intends to come and live in it Himself."

— C.S. Lewis (Mere Christianity)

April ' Happiness Project' the theme, LIGHTEN UP

It's APRIL!!!! SPRING IS IN THE AIR!!!! I Love this time of year everything smells so wonderful and the color is coming back to the sleepy grey world.

So, ready for the April Update? Welp, sorry, Im only going to give you the projects and then expound on them through out the month.

Here's the scoop-

* SING IN THE MORNING LA LA LA LA LA

*ACKNOWLEDGE THE REALITY OF PEOPLE'S FEELING'S (OOOOOHHHHH I HAVE LOTS TO SAY ON THIS ONE :D DON'T WORRY IT'S ALL GOOD STUFF )

* BE A TREASURE HOUSE OF HAPPY <------ (GOSH, I LOVE THIS WORD) MEMORIES!

* TAKE TIME FOR PROJECTS.

Ok, I really want to hear what ya'll have to say about this stuff.

You know I will have stuff to say.

Ok, start typing.

All my love,

Hil

WORK SMART

As past posts have described, I am trying to work smarter not harder. I have found when trying to work smarter you have to say the word "NO." kind of a lot.

In the past I have hated saying this word for many reasons. Fear of disappointment/hurting feelings/making people feel like I don't care about them/ (and my favorite) being a BAD friend. Which is something I was told when I was little and sadly took it to heart.

Here are the reasons I should say "NO."

By saying "NO" I am able to place healthy boundaries between work and home. (I.e. working past or before allotted time for appointments.)

By saying "no" I am exercising my free agency to choose what I will, and will not do with my time. Therefore respecting myself. In turn able to fully recharge, and be more capable of serving others.

By saying "No" I am not spread so thin that I take it out on those I love the most. ( Isn't it funny that we choose the ones that support us best to fall apart on?)

So here is my practice for saying "No" today.

Client calls

Client- Hilaree, Can I change my appointment to a morning appointment?

(I only work at night now.)

Me- No

" a lack of planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on my part." -Gma Shauna

The End!

Well, I was very diplomatic, but you get the gist.

Anyway my 2 cents for the day. Try saying 'NO' sometime, you might love it/hate it. Whatever, its good for you. I can see that it's good for me and that makes me 'Happy'

Love,

Hil

Wow THIS MONTH!!!

This is just a little update on how the 'Happiness Project" is going.

I find it interesting when you are trying your best, your best is tested. While I have reviewed the 'projects' of the month I have been hit with some really hard things that are testing my metal. Some of these things I didn't want to write about, but I realize that you will not see the full measure of the good without the bad. Don't worry this will not be a depressing post. :)

This month I am supposed to live in the moment. I tend to be 15 minutes ahead of myself AT ALL TIMES. So I have tried to recognize moments and capture them in my mind, every color, sound, texture and emotion. So far it has worked pretty well, especially with Noa and Jarom. Here is where my metal was tested............

Once upon a time, there was a mommy with a sleeping baby in the carriage. The mommy knew that the baby boy would be waking soon; so she bought the kiddo a kids meal from ye, yucky wendy's. The baby boy was sleeping and so mommy thought that maybe since she was right by 'dear lizzy' she would run in and grab some soap. real quick.... ( mom's, most of you know where this is going) the mommy left her little snuggle in the carriage and parked in a way so that she could see him. Ran into 'dear lizzy' and ran out. ( Yes, I know I shouldn't have done this. and trust me after this episode, it wont happen again.) When the mommy got back out to the carriage 5 minutes later, there was a kindly woman disguised as a wicked witch who took the liberty of telling the mommy that she was going to call the kings horseman on her and that she was a horrible mother for leaving her little boy in the carriage. The mommy told the kindly woman disguised as a wicked witch that it was " non of her affair" jumped in the carriage and cried all the way back to the castle of Garlick. (everyone knows my house as the 'Garlicks' house.)

The mommy thought that she really was a horrible mommy and that soon the kings horseman would soon come to behead her. But never fear the kindly woman disguised as a wicked witch was full of hot air and peppers, and the kings horseman never did arrive.

The moral of my story is this. Yes, mommy makes mistakes, and yes, sometimes REALLY BIG ONES. But the thing that makes this mommy a good/great mommy is that she is willing to learn and grow. She recognized that she was wrong and now she really does appreciate the kindly woman disguised as a WICKED WITCH. The end.

Story # 2

I am struggling with the decision to dissolve my business altogether or expand.... Unfortunately, when one leaves a place of business sometimes there can be hurt feelings or just immaturity. Even if your ex- boss is in her 40's. Long story short facebook has a way of showing you who people really are. (so be careful what you post) :) I was called A B@#$% and someone threatened to punch me or implied that I should be punched. All because I requested that facebook remove my pictures from that salons page. It was not meant out of anger or hatred. It was merely the next step to have my pictures removed as other efforts didn't work. The main reason I left was to expand and later found that nice things were not being said about me. Some times it is hard to grow because people like things the way that they are/feel intimidated/don't want you to succeed etc. The lesson from this experience is this, I will continue to grow and succeed no matter what I do. Because it is in me. It's in all of us. We have greatness instilled within us. it reminds me of a quote my mom has on her bathroom wall :)

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. And It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” (a very inspired woman) Marianne Williamson

Today is the start of the rest of my life and I will let my light shine, my goal/promise is that I will let your light shine too :) we can be bright together, therefore being 'Happier' together mmmmmk!

Love,

Hilaree

Noa's BIRTHDAY!!

Little Noa is 2! I can't believe how the time is flying by!

( Start from the bottom and work your way up.)

ok let's do it together. I love you Noa Thank you for letting us be your parents!
Blow out the candles
Make a wish my little angel...

Heres the daddy and he is so cute.

Here's the cake! Its so Cute!

To all you Beautiful Women

As I have had the special privilege of being on the Relief society committee I have had lots of opportunities to serve. One of the most recent opportunities required that I make a short film of relief society around the world. The link that I posted above is not my work, but I did pattern mine after it. I wanted to share this particular one because this whole project got the wheels rolling in my head.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PqfCXBsXGfQ

Women are beautiful by their very nature. We naturally are nurturing, loving and caring. We love to be needed. I thought this fascinating as Heavenly Father has instilled all of these qualities in women that He would also organize a society in which to grow and develop in so many other ways. I have always loved to be around women who are uplifting; it feeds my energy and soul. It is also interesting that if that same group of women choose to focus on, or spew negative things how the spirit or energy changes in the room. I continue to marvel at our power to do good and I admire those who (even when it is hard) choose to be good, to be a beacon of light and continue anyway to choose to be a great reflection of our Father in Heaven.

I am thankful for the wonderful beautiful women around me, whether it be at the grocery store in line at check out; or my sweet and wonderful family and friends. Thank you for continuously showing me the beauty that you posses. Its better than spring time blossoms. I love you.

Hilaree

Little Prayers.

It' s late. We just finished putting Noa to bed. I am actually not usually apart of his bed time as usually I am working at night. It was a sweet thing to see that Noa and Jarom have this special time together.

Routine goes as follows-

First bath time, Noa wants to put toys on mine and Jaroms head. Then its time to count all of Noas toes. It sounds like this, Mommy starts, "One..........." Noa," chtwooo, freeeeee, sixtxxxx, ten!" ( Pretty good for just turning two.) Then it's time to get out.

Pj's!! Tonight he has his bear footie pajamas and once he is dressed he jumps on the bed and says, "dad! Monkeys!!" Which means, "say the 5 little monkeys one." So Jarom started, "5 little monkeys jumping on the bed, one fell off and bomped his head, momma called the dr. and the dr. said...............?" Noa " NO MONKEYS....... BED!"

At this point its time to wind down so Jarom takes Noa all around the room and points to his animal pictures. Noa, "Monkey, chomp-chomp (alligator), lion, giraffe and ppphhhhfeeeeeerrrrrr!!!'( which is the sound that the elephant makes.)

We say prayers, its my turn. Noa folds his arms and at the end there is a resounding AMEN!!!

Jarom then will wrap Noa up in a blanket, give him his bottle and snuggle him until he is almost asleep and then sneak out of his room with more grace than a ballerina!

I am always excited to have alone time with Jarom, I do also miss Noa when he is asleep. Bedtime is definitely a must when you have had to be on Mom/Dad duty all day. But I cannot deny that Im always so happy to see Noa first thing in the morning bright eyed and ready to seize the day.

I love my little boy! I love Jarom! They are my everything.

Good night!

Failure

Have you ever told someone about something and you think its awesome and they think its not? Or, you tell someone something and your totally dismissed? but then they hear that exact same thing from somewhere/someone else and they think that it's the BEST Idea in the world?

When I have something that I think is exciting and I am dismissed that is the BIGGEST form of failure in my mind. It makes me feel invalid, un-appreciated and discredited. This makes me not want to try. i.e. try to help, try to please, try to try. I often then will resort to avoidence and quite honestly a little bitterness

Since March has a project concerning failure and suggests that you enjoy it once in a while........ I guess I have already done the first part, I have succeded... in some wierd way. Now the question is, how am I supposed to feel joyful about my failed attempts? Especially when I love these people?

I guess no one can make you feel a certain way without your permission. Or at least that is what I have been told/taught. So I am going to practice this simple rule. I do not want to be bitter or feel, invalid, un-appreciated and discredited. And if this means sticking to the weather for a little while, then so be it. Its non of my business how you feel about me :)

Anyway, I wanted to be real about this progect and put the hard stuff up too. So hear it is.

your stuggling blogger, Hil

March Happines progect Theme 'Work'

Objectives for March Include:

1. Launch a Blog
2. Enjoy the fun of failure
3. Ask for help
4. Work smart
5. ENJOY NOW

For those of you who maybe wanted to get a head start. I launched my blog. I do not enjoy failure.... so this should be interesting. I am learning to ask for help..... but I have to admit it is totally against my nature. I prefer to do things my way or not at all. so yes, its a pride thing.
Work smart....... funny that this one should come up this month, I really have to decide what to do with my business....dissolve or take the next step. As for enjoy now, I love this challenge... I totally have the attitude of, When I get there I'll be happy, If We do this, when I weigh this then Ill be happy. You get the gist. What I will be doing is consciously looking for moments in the now that are special wonderful and ingrain them in my memory. I don't want to look back on ifs,whens, and thens. I know by doing this I won't.

My Arch-nemesis

CURSE YOU STARBUCKS!!!!


My
silent
comfort
drink

Pretty sure that I
have drank at least
this much
in my life time

by myself--->

Jarom doesn't love that
I slowly spend the wad on this stuff at 3.88$ a
pop. This is an expensive habit!
Jarom came up with this brilliant plan to help me quit.
for every day that I go without a chai he will add

3$ to a Hawaii FUND!
And if there is a day that is especially hard he will add 8$ if I don't give to temptation!

Sweet deal right?! here's the catch..... if I give in one day he'll take out 30 buckeroos.... not as cool.

Anyway! Great incentive!

I went to the doctor before I got pregnant with Noa and they said that, "Although I'm not diabetic, my sugar levels are through the roof!! If you want your hormones to work properly CUT out the sugar!!!" So at the time I was having at least 1 starbucks visit a day, I decided that This isn't worth it and I cut out that much sugar and with a little help and a little cleansing, I was happily surprised to see a positive pregnancy test.

Well now we are in the same boat and I really need to break this habit for more reasons than one.....

so with this plan, a lot of support and a little faith in myself I can kick this habit in the patootie.
Thus adding to my Happiness project of being free of this bad habit.

The End.

February HAPPINESS PROJECT

Since it is the end of February and I haven't listed my projects, I thought maybe today would be a great day to reflect on the months events according to 'The Happiness Project'


Tasks of the month include:

1. Quit nagging
2. Don't expect praise or appreciation
3. Fight right
4. No dumping
5. Give Proofs of love


I loved this chapter for several reasons. Mostly because studying marriage/relationships has all but taken over my life since last October. I went to a class called 'Celebrating Men Satisfying Women' This was a Saturday-Sunday class all about how society has changed women s relationships with men. Unfortunately, our relationships are greatly skewed, but the class offered great advice on how we can fix it. Some of the things that I learned-

Women are very powerful and sometimes we use our power for the wrong reasons.


Examples:

We take a mans power away by:
-with holding sex
-Criticizing them (i.e. Whats wrong with you???)
- We roll our eyes ( Yes, its true the only person who hates this more than your mom is your spouse.)
- Nothing is good enough (i.e. not being impressed, comparing to other men (especially dad), mothering them, interrupting them.


The better attitude is to empower men, especially our significant other since we chose them to be our prince charming, let them fill the job they intend to do.

To learn more about the amazing classes that I have taken and also some freebies, go to http://www.understandmen.com/ Click on the "freebies" tab for some nuggets of wisdom.


So back to the list of February's projects

QUIT NAGGING

Dr Robert Lund suggests that we women need to put a specific time line on what we ask our men to do.

For example " Jarom will you take the garbage out after dinner?"
Not "Jarom will you take the garbage out when you get a free second?"

Men are happy to do what we ask them ( especially when we ask nicely and maybe give 'em a little smoochie) because they thrive on seeing us happy.

Have you heard they saying "happy wife, happy life"? well its true. Men need DIRECT communication. If you want them to make you happy tell them SPECIFICALLY what you want. Don't hint that the garbage needs to be taken out. Any guy will tell you that they will not pick up on hints. And NO the phrase " If he loved me more, he would know what I want." does NOT apply. So, ask directly and (might I add) sweetly. You will also be happier knowing that you are not a nag.


DON'T EXPECT PRAISE OR APPRECIATION.

This doesn't mean you don't get praise or appreciation it only means you better be willing to hand it out and recognize what your husband does do for you. That way they are willing to return the gesture. But here's the little thing we women tend to miss. Men do show appreciation in ways that are valid to them. i.e went to work today so that the family could have a roof over their head. or filled up your tank or changed your oil. SO IF YOU WANT SOMETHING OTHER THAN FUNCTIONAL APPRECIATION START WITH, " Honey (big sweet sincere smile) tell me how nice the house looks today since it took me all day to clean it" Be cute about it. P.s I did this this month and Jarom stopped in his tracks turned around and gave me a big hug and kissed me and said, " Honey the house looks amazing! thank you!" Oh how I love him.



FIGHT RIGHT

Choose your battles! Is it really that important to say, "honey you left you socks right next to the OPEN hamper!!!"(?) GROWL!! HISSSS!!! FANGS SHOWING!! No, Not worth it.

The reason I bring up the sound effects is because I hear these in my head when the fight is going to be petty.

I had many chances this month to practice this part of the project. Here's what happened. I had just finished cleaning the whole house, Minus laundry and it felt GOOD!! well just as I was about to leave a very clean Bathroom, Jarom came in and put his deodorant in there. (that wasn't the problem, it belongs in the bathroom) He put it in the wrong place in the bathroom!

GROWL! HISSSS! FANGS SHOWING!! "JAROM, I JUST FINISHED IN HERE!!! BAHHHHHHH" ......Poor guy.

Jarom- " but it goes in the bathroom..."

me- " I know but it goes right here!" (as I move it 6 inches to the left on the counter..... )

I know like I said I crashed and burned, but the next time an event happened I just bit my tongue. That hurt less than hurting my loves feelings/pride.

"An uneasy conscience is a hair in the mouth" -mark twain

Ok

NO DUMPING

I know that this is hard for women but let me explain. Men Listen, "what's the point? What's the problem?" Women Listen to AAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLLLL the details and then empathize. The problem with this is that men will try to fix it when your telling him about a bad day. This tends to make us angry and feel like he isn't listening. So either you need to say, "Honey I've had a really bad day I just need you to listen and then at the end say, "poor baby/ Oh honey that was a bad day/ what can I do to make it better." or go tell your girl friends about it. Because men cannot take rehashing a day over and over again. Women like to go over feelings and manners and oh how dare that happened. Men don't.

I did do this this month with Jarom. This is actually something that I learned in October at the 'celebrating men satisfying women' class. So I have had a little time to practice. The first few times are hard, but I promise the practice is worth it.

AND LASTLY, BUT MOST IMPORTANTLY:

We tend to fall into routines of daily life; and forget that or spouse was once someone that we got butterflies thinking about. We couldn't wait to see them and what fun, exciting things you would do or say. Find that again if it has been lost.

My try for this month is well... none of your business. Let's just say Jarom liked it and it was a surprise.

Thanks for reading this way too long post. I cant wait to tell you about March!

"i una howd you"

Noa says the cutest things! I love that he has found his voice. His newest phrase is ," i una howd you" (i want to hold you)
Melts my heart every time. How do you say no to a kid that wants to hold you??

He also says, "i howd your han" and, "ina kiss" - he then runs as fast as he can to you and kisses whatever he can reach with his little lippies. On Jarom it's usually his knee , on myself its either my hand or hip.

Noa is now 2 and it feels like time has flown by! In the last 2 years I have watched a little person change and discover new things. I love that it reminds me that I am also a person changing and discovering, that we are never too old to change something and discover the treasures of life.

Back to Noa :)

Anyway, my dad told me that every stage of childhood is the cutest (notice he didn't say anything about the teenage years) when Noa was born. Kinda hard to comprehend when your holding a 7lb nothin' squishy baby in your arms. But, as always my daddy was right and every stage in Noa's short life has been the cutest!

Perfect person in my life to add to my happiness project.

The Happines Project

I have started a new book called, "The Happiness Project' By Gretchen Rubin. I casually picked it up at my mom's house one day and couldn't put it down. The conversation went like this.

Me- After inhaling the first chapter, "Mom, um are you done with this?" (pointing to the book)
Mom- "No I haven't started it."
Me- " Um..... can I borrow it?" (Fingers crossed behind my back... What she didn't know was that I was going to confiscate it whether she said yes or no. After all possession is 9/10ths of the law..... )
Mom- "Sure."
Me- "Sweet!"

The end

So a book full of projects that help us to expand our happiness scale.Sounds fun right? Actually some of the projects have been rather taxing; however very worth it.
January's projects:

1. Go to sleep earlier
2. Exercise Better
3. Toss, restore, organize.
4. Tackle a nagging task
5. Act more energetic.

So Mostly I have been going to sleep earlier ... ish I was crazy enough to sign up for the Provo half marathon June 11th. You will not believe What I have thrown out. (seriously, didn't think that I was a pack rat......) Tackled the nagging task of getting life insurance ANNNNNDDDD I don't even need to act more energetic, I actually do feel very energetic about all accomplished this month. (well last month, I started the book late.) Now onto February and I will post more about that later.

In doing this full year project I hope to indeed have a happier out look on life. I would like to be quite clear that no, I am not depressed. I just think that there can be more smiles, laughter, gratefulness, accomplishments and overall more sense of well being.

all my love,

Hil

P.S. I was once told that my Name means "happy" huh, go figure.